An Open Letter To Anyone Who Thinks It’s Too Late To Start Over

Hi, yea so I’m just going to cut to the chase. We’re young (and if you’re not, don’t leave. This for you too!). We’re struggling. Sallie Mae is pimping us. And it’s left many people feeling like after ALL that work they put in to get their degree or job, that there’s a set rule that we have to stay in the same place forever.

Too late to start over

 

Is this you?

Do you feel high-key embarrassed about where you are in your journey? Did you think you would be much further and more successful than you currently are now?

Do you just plain hate your career? (Let’s be honest here)

You’re not alone. In fact, 80% of people aren’t happy with their jobs. That’s A LOT.

And the truth is, many of us fear that it’s too late to try again. Finding something you love to do or trying to put yourself out there in a foreign experience is an overwhelming feeling.

But it’s killing you from the inside. Your legacy is slowly fading away every day you decide to settle for “it is what it is” vs. “It’s possible to live a full life.”

Your legacy is slowly fading away every day you decide to settle Click To Tweet

And umm…Who told you there was an age limit in dream chasing?

Greatness takes time and on that journey, it may require some change. For example:

  • Oscar-nominated QWUEEN Ava DuVernay didn’t pick up a camera until she was 33 years old. Let me repeat –  she didn’t even PICK UP a camera until ten years ago. No film school. She was a publicist before.
  • J.K Rowling was homeless before she started to see success with Harry Potter at 32. Homegirl didn’t even have a job to change from.
  • Rapper Tyler the Creator worked at a Starbucks for two years before jumping into music around 19.
  • Ken Jeong (From The Hangover series) was a legit doctor before he quit to purse acting full time at 37 years old. If that isn’t a jump, I don’t know what is.
  • Vera Wang was a figure skater turned Vogue editor before pursing her passion for design at 40.
  • Martha Stewart was a stockbroker before discovering her love for design. She designed her first cookbook in her 30s and the rest was history.

You want to know what this people did differently? They started.

Contrary to popular belief, being happy is important

There is an urgency to be successful but not an urgency to find out what makes us happy. We get so frustrated trying to be what sounds good on paper, only to realize that it’s not even what we enjoy.

You should be pressed about your happiness. You should be fighting to honor your authentic self. And every day you go to a job you despise, you rob yourself of that.

Now there is a formula to this. Just like switching a major or switching lanes on a highway (unless you’re a road rage maniac. I ain’t judging though), you have to analyze the next move and make sure there is nothing getting in the way.

You can start preparing for a change by doing this:

Explore Your Passions

We often think that starting over means jumping into something right away but it can often mean just dabbling into what you love to do. Using Martha Stewart as an example again, she starting making cookbooks and refurnishing houses as something fun that eventually turned into an empire. Pick things you love doing and see what desire grows from there. Ideas could include –

  • Starting a website, documenting something you love to do
  • Creating an IG page of something you’re interested in
  • Taking up photography
  • Taking a new class
  • Attending an event in your area

Want to know yourself a little deeper? Take this personality test that will show you areas that you may want to explore.

Set a Deadline

I know that when I’m just talking without any real intention on acting, there is never a deadline attached to my “goal.” If you really want to be intentional about conquering your fears of the job switch, set a goal date and prepare like a maniac. Read books to sharpen your skills. Go back to school to get more credibility. And put the date somewhere you can see it as a constant reminder like your mirror or fridge. When you constantly have that date in mind it will push you to keep going during the times the mountain seems way too big to climb.

Take One Small Step Not a Big Leap 

There are so many stories I read where people just chunk deuce to their jobs one day and its created this image that everyone has to do that. ISSA LIE.

Easing into a new profession can help you get some experience as well as show you if it’s actually something you want to do. Ways to do this can include finding a part time job you can work on nights or weekends, volunteering at events the industry may host or even reaching out to people to potentially find a mentor.

Give Yourself a Brand Makeover

Believe it or not, you are a walking brand. What you believe of yourself is what will show and trust that people will take notice. If you have thought about taking a leap into owning your own business, working for your dream company or more, then you have to act like you deserve to have it.

Clean up your social media profiles. Your dog, that tree and the homie down the block are nice but does it show who you are and where you are trying to go? Begin to create pages that will stand out to potential customers or employers with depicting who you are, your work and what you believe in.

Accept That People Will Judge You

A huge block that causes us not to step into what makes us happy is the fear of what other people will whisper behind our back. LET THEM.

*for the people in the back* LETTTT THEMMMM.

They don’t pay your bills or make you so giddy inside that you want to dance just thinking about your life. People are going to talk. People may even call you weird or crazy. But you have to chase to be different and do things that most people won’t even attempt to do. Accept that there will be finger-pointing but those same people will be the ones who turn into your “I went to 2nd grade with him/her” person.

Let’s turn the doubters into your biggest fans, shall we?

Turn your doubters into your biggest fans Click To Tweet

There is no such thing as job security, folks. The job you feel stuck at could go out of business, fire you or hire someone to a position you feel like you deserve – forcing you to start over anyway. Life is so much greater when we see what it’s actually talkin about. Don’t you think it’s time for you to try?

If you’re down to finally jump, tell me below! Make sure to stay connected by signing up for my emails. I have been working on some amazing stuff to send to the crew.

You got this, we got this.

Alaina <3

 

12 Confirmations That You’re Doing Just Fine in Your Life

 

Last night while I was doing some research on millennials I came across these excruciating titles:

“Millennials, – The Me, Me, Me Generation”

“Millennials are actually the least entrepreneurial generation”

“Young Millennials are the worst behaved drivers”

“Tired Of Millennials’ Participation Trophy Culture? Blame Identity Politics”

Why are these old people so pressed?

It really frustrated me because our generation is already having a very hard time finding jobs in their field, overcoming loan debt, moving out on our own, remaining confident, choosing the right relationships, remembering to get our oil changed and NOT LOSING OUR MARBLES.

It’s a millennial bash fest on the internet and I’m tired.

Now I will agree that many of us are struggling with patience and clarity in our 20s. Acknowledging this struggle is by no means a pass to be average. But we have definitely let the wait for our goals discourage us from giving our best and pushing past the pain. This has single-handedly been my biggest struggle as a millennial post-grad. Adulting has often left me frustrated, doubtful, stressed and anxious beyond compare.

But to constantly call us narcissistic and lazy when we are the most world changing generation is beyond me.

Millennials gave you platforms like Facebook and Twitter to promote your hating, trash articles on. Ya’ll NEED us and knowing my worth to this world does not make me entitled.

*Whoosah. Calming down*

Fam, you’re amazing. A little impatient sometimes, but dope AF. And with all the personal and professional obstacles we have to climb I wanted to take the time to remind you that you’re doing just fine.

Our 20s are about figuring it out, not having it all together. Give yourself room to make mistakes, challenge yourself, overcome hardships and love yourself harder then you ever have.

Our 20s are about figuring it out, not having it all together. Click To Tweet

Below is a list of reasons why you are doing better than you think. You may have three of these, you may have all 12 but just know that if you have at least one (which I know you do) you have the tools to truly live the life you desire.

 

  1. You have a roof over your head
    • Praise break for sturdy roofs. Many of us are still living with our parents and that makes us uncomfortable. Don’t be ashamed of that. What a blessing it is to have a safe place to make mistakes and get your life together. Put your pride to the side and take the flexibility while also learning from your family. You are being prepared to dominate your lane and once God gives you the green light, ain’t no turning back bih. And for those who live on your own…do I even need to explain why you are the truth?
  2. You have ambition (Working toward a clear goal)
    • Oftentimes we get so caught up on “the other side” of success.  But the gag is, you’re always going to be fighting for more. YOU SHOULD be fighting for more. If you have a dream and are working toward it then you are winning. Never stop believing in those little desires that tug at your heart to be better.
  3. You have the ability to pay your bills
    • I will never forget the day our lights got shut off. Growing up I had never experienced real hardships that I can remember so this was a very humbling experience for me. Not everyone is able to pay one bill, let alone all of them. If you paid your bills (even late) then declare and believe that you will receive financial freedom one day. A book that has transformed the way I manage money is Dave Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover.
  4. You have friends that motivate you
    • Nothing is worse than walking this road alone. If you have at least one friend that speaks life into you and keeps you accountable, you are doing great. There are so many people wasting time with superficial friendships that keep us distracted and won’t help us grow. Keep the real ones close to you and make sure they know how much you appreciate them.
  5. You have overcome setbacks
    • You remember that situation you thought you would never get through? The breakup. The death. The job loss. Sickness. You made it. Can I get a hand clap? *Hurricane Chris-like* When we are so focused on where we want to go we can forget where we have been and what we achieved. Things that came to break you made you stronger. It’s now part of this amazing testimony you are living. Go look in the mirror. You are holding the strength of somebody that has a destiny. Be proud of that.
  6. You have a well earned degree
    • With all this money we have given to Sallie Mae we better be proud of this degree out here. No matter what people say, getting a college education is extraordinary. You fought through the hardships of balancing classes while trying to understand yourself and you dominated the heck out of it. Even if life is not aligned with where you thought you would be when you graduated, don’t take for granted the experience college gave you. You know how to push through and achieve something big. We lit. We educated.
  7. You have a supportive family
    • Big ups for families who support us. Now this doesn’t mean they agree with every decision we make but that their love for us surpasses any mistake or choice. I can run off to Canada and elope and know that my mom will love me through her disgust haha. Not everyone has that support and it’s something we can take for granted. If you have a family who will never give up on you then relax and appreciate them. Even if you don’t, know that family doesn’t always mean your bloodline. Continue to seek valuable relationships that will pour into you like family should.
  8. You haven’t quit
    • If you are reading this blog post then there is something inside of you that wants more. You have had many rough days (I know ALL about those days) but here you are giving yourself another chance to see what you can do. Never underestimate the fight that’s in you. It may simply be getting out of bed and brushing your teeth but keep pushing toward what you deserve and I promise it will come to pass.
  9. You’re not the same person you were a year ago.
    • Thank GOD that I am not the same person I was a year ago. When I look back on my old journals I can see someone who is continuing to grow. Now there are still many areas that I have yet to overcome (procrastination and tardiness being two big ones) but I’m making progress. Think back to exactly a year ago. Has your mindset shifted? Have you dropped people you used to adore? Has your style changed? Gotten closer to God? Really sit and think about the last year (even if it was a hot mess) and see how much you learned. You are getting wiser everyday.
  10. You seek new experiences
    • We are a traveling, try-it-out generation. Every year you are pushing yourself to try new things like traveling internationally or painting with a twist. These experiences are helping us to get out of our comfort zone and become more well-rounded. For me, I plan to attend at least one conference by myself in 2017. Seeking things that aren’t familiar are great for personal growth. Write out that bucket list (I always recommend at least 100) and dream big.
  11. You are employed
    • I struggled with this for a long time because while I was employed (at a day care center) after college it wasn’t my dream job. Or even a job in my field. I quickly began to shift my mindset because I knew that I was being humbled. I learned that I had to fight for what I wanted and working at this daycare was part of that fight. From the job of your dreams to working at Walmart, know that these opportunities are always pit stops for greater. Keep pushing.
  12. God will come through. Always.

 

See I told you that you were doing fine. How many of these could you check off your list? List the confirmations  below! And sign-up for my weekly emails below too. I have some cool stuff I’m working to send you.

You got this. We got this.

Alaina <3