Unlike Sir Kevin Gates, I DO Get Tired

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. – Hebrews 12:1

You know what’s so tough about running this do better race in our 20’s?

We are so focused on trying to compete in competitions we were never supposed to run.

Throughout my life, and even more so in Vegas, I have desperately struggled with trying to keep up with everyone else’s race.

The truth is I’m slow ya’ll. Yeah, I said it.

tired life adulting post grad

I would love to hurdle over my problems and win the season I’m in but the gag is that God has specifically created me to go MY pace. Not the pace of others.

But it’s frustrating, trust that I get it. Everybody is passing you, running circles around you, laughing and pointing.

The shame of not being who I wanted to be slowed me down even more.

At one point I wasn’t even running, I was walk skipping.

I should have practiced to prepare for the race God assigned me, but I wasted the time sitting and looking at everyone else. Comparing their stride to mine.

So when God forced me to start running this year,  I got tired.

About to full blown pass OUT. You know like when your chest is burning so deep that you know for sure you’re having a heart attack? It’s terrible. Like HALP.

Are you out of shape?

Do you grow weary and frustrated because God assigned you to the 800m instead of the 100m dash?

Not only do we slow ourselves down by comparison but also by holding on to distractions that create dead weight. It’s like running with wet clothes on.

Yes, you may be moving but chile you ain’t going very far. And you itchy.

I have found that when we are on the right course and even in the right race, we are trotting so slowly because of the distractions in our lives.

For the past couple weeks, I’ve been determined to stop playing and start practicing for the victories I know that God will reveal.

Tha Warm Up

My single most powerful warm up has been diving into the Bible and asking God to show me who I am. We allow so many distractions to keep us bound by insecurity and shame because we don’t know who we are.

This life is crazy and not knowing who you are leaves you to compromise. To skip the workout all together.


I don’t mean how we feel about ourselves in the good times. I mean sticking to a truth that doesn’t change when we reach those deep, dark ugly places of us. I found that even through my raggedy mess I am still saved (Eph. 2:8), restored (2 Cor. 5:18-19), chosen (1 Peter 5:9), forgiven (Psalm 31:1-1), a light (Matthews 5:14), perfect (Hebrews 10:14), POPPIN (Alaina 1:1)

post grad adulting tired

Write out the ugly emotions you feel while running this race. The only reason I got to those words was because I saw myself as the complete opposite: average, rejected, insignificant, unlovable, hidden, lazy.

I use these verses when the world tries to convince me of the latter.

The Race

No matter how fast or slow you go, distractions will keep you losing.

What is your morning routine like? Is your mouth full of complaints? Can you turn up every weekend but can’t turn down to put more into goals for the year?

Many people are passing us, not because they are better, but because they are focused.

This was supposed to be a short post and went so much longer than intended dangit.

But the revelation I wanted to share is that you must desperately fight to do you. Run the race you we designed to kill not the one you think people want. Not the one you think YOU want. But the one that you were created for.

I’m so thankful for the joy. So thankful for the peace I am finding by being me in a world that tells you to be everyone else.

Keep your heart three stacks. Your season’s finish line is closer than you think.

Let’s #glowup


Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. – Hebrews 12:1-3





#ReclaimingMyTime2017: From An Extremely Boring Adult Life (+31 Poppin’ Solutions)


“What’s been up with you?”

I feel like this is a mandatory question in the catch up with a friend handbook. I’ve tried to make my life seem more interesting but unfortunately I usually come up with this:


A boring life

Wait, you think I’m joking? I literally say this verbatim every time:

A boring life


I didn’t mean to be boring. It kind of just happened.

I drowned into the same, predictable routines. Wake up, work my 9-5, go home, waste evenings tearing up some food and binging on TV. (I may throw in an occasional workout class or two to not feel guilty).

Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

Although some cool things occasionally happened to me, I got accustomed to describing my life as boring to:

A). Sit down, be humble

B). Distract myself from the exciting milestones of people around me

You see, it became easier to describe my life as boring when everyone was having kids, getting engaged, receiving promotions, graduating and traveling all over.

As I got caught up in the big milestones of others, my loathe for my own “boring” life continued to grow and grow.


Could it be that you are comparing your life to people who secretly settled?

I heard someone say this and dropped my jaw. We stay comparing our journey to people who may be secretly suffering with the decisions they brag about.

So how did I deal? I wasted a lot of time.

I wasted time trying to fill those boring holes by entertaining men.

“At least your phone ain’t dry,” they said.

I wasted time with people who didn’t care about improving themselves.

“At least you’re out the house,” they said.

I wasted many mornings and nights scrolling through the lives of others instead of improving my own.

And day by day, I drifted further from who I am by believing my boring life was insignificant. I accepted that being mediocre wasn’t all that bad.

The actual truth is that my life had been boring because I had allowed it to be.

Life is boring because we allow it to be Click To Tweet

Although I still hit up the club, the happy hours, the social events, had the long phone calls, the refreshed timeline of The Shaderoom; my soul was convinced that I just wasn’t that special to do anything great.

Why I Am Finally Reclaiming My Time From Being Boring

This week, my friend Calah and I hollered as Maxine Waters created the ultimate clapback of 2017. Smoothly interrupting Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin from distracting her, she snatched him together by constantly stating that she was reclaiming her time when he would start drifting off topic.

Calah and I began to talk and realized that there were actually a bajillion things we honestly needed to reclaim our time from.

We teamed up to talk about areas that we’ve wasted time (check out her post tomorrow on unmet expectations. She went there, trust that).

It hurt me to face the fact that I thought my life was without purpose because I had not experienced any “big moments” in awhile.

I was waiting on these crazy things to happen but the truth is that my miracles were actually in the boring moments. When I started drifting off into other distractions it stopped me from taking advantage of the time I had to grow myself.

Reclaiming my time

31 Ways to Stop Snoozing on Your Life and Create an Incredible One

Why is life so boring when big things aren’t happening?

I believe that in the boring season, God wants to strip us of things that will not add value to our lives. Like preparing for a championship, He places us in isolation so that we can get ready for those big wins.

Have you even been practicing?

You not gonna win if you don’t practice. You’re not gonna be able to avoid the tricks and plays of the other teams if you don’t study the game.

We are so used to dysfunction or attention that when God finally gives us the quiet moments to grow and heal, we describe them as boring. Nothing exciting. Stale as some old chips.

The truth is that the boring days are what adds to our lives, not take away. When we realize how valuable this season is, we will RECLAIM THAT TIME.

Maxine waters reclaiming my time

Stop wasting your opportunity to grow. Stop ignoring the pull to understand yourself and God’s will for you in deeper ways. I know you haven’t fully taken advantage of it. You ain’t gotta lie [to yourself], Craig.

If you are ready to love your “boring” season, here are 31 things you can do to start creating a more meaningful life during the wait:

  1. Pray daily, seek God first: This truly awakens you if you seek God genuinely. He speaks when you finally decide to stop talking.
  2. Honor your passions: Commit to doing one thing that brings you joy and simply do it for fun. I personally like learning songs word for word so I can yell them at concerts. High key need to go to Trap Karaoke still.
  3. Create a bucket list and start completing it: We play so small in the boring season. Start going after what gives you life.
  4. Remove distractions that harm your peace: I am currently cleansing from certain music and shows. When you constantly feed yourself with trash it alters your state and mind.
  5. Walk away from toxic relationships: This is IMPERATIVE in this season. Toxic people will easily manipulate you into drama and bad decisions and you are so “bored” that you will entertain it.
  6. Laugh more, worry less: My go-to laughs are Lil Duval’s rendition of Musiq Soulchild’s Just Friends, K-CI and JoJo on Tom Joyner and the lady on the martyr train. Don’t @ me.
  7. Chase wisdom: You can NOT grow if you are not constantly searching for wisdom. The best book ever is the Bible.  Check Proverbs.
  8. Plan a staycation: I did this two weeks ago and it just rejuvenated my spirit to be in total silence. I watched sermons. Wrote in my journal. Prayed. Ate CiCi’s (again, don’t @ me), and did all the things I had been neglecting in self care. It’s okay to be alone. 
  9. Read books that add value to your growth: Books have been my saving grace. Currently, I’m on The Richest Man in Babylon and Think and Grow Rich.
  10. Learn to forgive yourself and others: Release the chains you’ve been in by forgiving yourself and others for mistakes in the past. *Warning. This may come without closure from the other person.
  11. Cleanse your social media timelines: Unfollow people who post and retweet trash. It is so easy to start doubting and feeling all over the place by just one negative post.
  12. Avoid negative self talk: Some people say negative things about them selves for fun but it’s not funny though. Speak love and life into yourself. I suggest creating some affirmations you can say when you feel unsure of yourself.
  13. Join a community/group in your city: I personally started going to Zumba again and truly love body rolling to Fetty Wap and screaming OHKAYYY.
  14. Goal set: We literally have FOUR MONTHS left in 2017. What can you get done? I promise it’s still possible. Start with goals for the month.
  15. Journal your journey: Journaling not only frees my mind from all the crazy thoughts in my head but it’s key on measuring my growth. I love looking back at my journals from college (you already know I was a hot mess).
  16. Find someone to pour into you and someone you can pour into: I saw this in a post but make it a mission to find one person that is where you want to be and build a relationship. On the flip side, find someone to mentor and help (look at YMCA’s, church, family & friends, etc.)
  17. Clean up your debt, people: You should already know my stand on this. Here’s how I’m breaking my paychecks to paycheck lifestyle.
  18. Throw away clutter in your home: I truly believe the clutter in your house can reflect the clutter in your mind. Clean up your room at least. Let some order in.
  19. Strengthen your body: When we don’t feel good, it directly affects our self confidence. Get moving. (Again, body rolling in Zumba for me)
  20. Guard your mind and your heart: This really should be #2. Guard your mind and heart from trash. Stop entertaining people who have the potential to hurt you. It’s so important to watch what speaks into you.
  21. Do something brave: Is there something you’ve wanted to do but terrified? GO DO IT. It’s going to build confidence and esteem. I personally want to sing in front of an audience for the first time. I sing to instrumentals in my car, already haha.
  22. Take time off social media: Social can be tew much and we tend to compare ourselves the more we obsess over it. Take breaks, drink water.
  23. Be a kid again: I LOVE getting back in a kid like state. It reminds me of peace and just living carefree. I could make anything fun in “boring” situations. Go build a fort or eat a lunchable.
  24. Be stingy like Ginuwine with your time: Stop wasting your time doing things you hate or throw the night away on the phone. Start replacing it with things that bring true value to you.
  25. Learn how to whip it real good: Oh geez I’m talking about food, calm down.
  26. Donate/sell all clothes that make your feel hella insecure (see what I did there): Even that shirt from the 12th grade. It has holes in the sleeves and looks yellow now, not white. If you don’t look in the mirror, say OOOO and wipe you down, then toss it.
  27. Create a self-love playlist for times you need it most: Must include Michael Jackson and some black cookout tunes to dance to.
  28. Don’t be tardy for the party: Being late is found to show that you may be disorganized or just not serious enough about where you’re going. Take it seriously and develop the discipline.
  29. Have a photoshoot. *Gucci voice*: Find a photographer friend (we all have one these days) and take some photos for a boost and some new profile pictures.
  30. Set your intention for the day: Every morning, write the things you want to accomplish that day. They may not all get done but you are practicing telling your day where to go instead of it always slapping you around.
  31. Seek love and be grateful: Take some time to recognize all the amazing blessings you experience each day. Even the small ones. Love yourself, love your flaws. And if you don’t know how then you are in the perfect season to find out.

When you learn to love your boring life, you realize it’s not a boring life at all. It’s the season of possibility, of change, of THE GLOW UP.

I challenge you to try some things on this list and stop looking at what everyone else is doing.

Your big moments are coming too but only if you prepare for them right now.

Time Reclaimed.


Overcoming the Pressure To Succeed When Life Seems Against Us

Pressure sucks.

And I’ve frequently found myself desperately chasing after my crazy expectations because of it.

Some days I feel like my head will explode.

Most days people never even knew I was suffering with an ungodly amount of unhappiness and disappointment.

I became magical at pretending. Served a better poker face than Lady Gaga.

And it doesn’t help that other people are constantly in my face about my life too.

“When are you going to move out?”

“Have you found a bae yet?”

“How’s that job search coming along?”


pressure to succeed

I tried to drain out the dreaded questions I received about my life but they never seemed to stop.

Even in my own head.

I knew that I wanted to be somebody. But how could I fill a desire that didn’t seem like it was coming true?

It became draining to hope and push toward my future self when my right now was tore up.

I bet you go through this too. 

Everyone does.

It’s frustrating to look yourself in the eye when the pressure you put on yourself is driving you crazy.

You know, the pressure to make it big. Or the pressure to make your parents proud, and prove the haters wrong.

The pressure to pay your bills, remember to floss, renew your license, drink water, to never go Eric Benet AND find your purpose?


Sway pressure to succeed kanye

I had become the queen of convincing myself that I wasn’t doing enough. So I pushed harder, stayed up later, grinded it out, and still woke up each day as lost as ever.

I believe that there can be good and bad pressure but clearly my dose of it was unhealthy. And if you’re still with me, then I bet you are out of pocket too.

Through my daily struggles, there were  5 main stages that I discovered we go through before we break free of the pressure in our lives:

The Overly Confident Stage

You’ve practically told everyone who would listen your plans in the world. In fact, I’m pretty sure you used a megaphone to make the announcement.

This stage sets you up to fail every time. Although you should be excited about your dreams, you shouldn’t yell them to everyone prematurely.

Hustle moves in silence and quite frankly you are too loud.

You are more worried about the bark than the bite. More worried about the applause than listening to God for the plan.

Too bad life starts to hit. No doors are opening and even more are closing. You’re sinking. Sinking right into…

The IDGAF Struggle Bus Stage

By this point, you just don’t care. I call this the rebellion stage because you are tired of believing in the goals you once had.

Nothing is working, so what’s the point?

Every time I hit this stage I abandon all of my goals and ambition. This last time, I stopped working out, I ate incredibly bad (so, SO much bread), I started obsessing over relationships, and truly settled for whatever life threw at me.

This is the most dangerous stage because your mind and heart are wide open to be targeted with bad influences, tainted opinions and ultimately the enemy. He’s ready for the slip ups to convince you that settling is far easier than trying.

You start reasoning with your bad decisions and avoiding correction.  It gets pretty ugly here.

You eventually make up your mind to crawl out of destruction, because success keeps whispering at your heart. But even still you are hit with…

The Confusion Stage

After you slowly start to come out of the rebellious stage, you sit there confused. A hot mess. Just in limbo.

It becomes paralyzing because you don’t know what step to take next.

I was stuck in this stage this entire summer. I wrote goals down but they would constantly change. I became unsure of myself.

More insecure than Issa.

I would get to everything “tomorrow” so that I could avoid the fact that I was lost in something scary, unfamiliar and hard.

I was reading this book by Joyce Meyer called “Battlefield of the Mind” and she described this stage as your logic fighting with your spirit.

You’re so confused because you are trying to make sense of things and ideas that God never intended for you to understand.

That’s why we are supposed to have faith. To not lead on our own understanding.

But we settle for being confused until are brain hurts until, BOOM…

The Wake Up Call Stage

I got my wake up call this week actually. Let me tell you real quick.

I had had enough of feeling so run down and unproductive so I got a hotel room to gain clarity and spend needed time with God.

Excited to be by myself for the first time in forever, I turned up some Party by Beyonce in the car and rapped Andre 3000’s part as loud as I could.

I felt free. Ready to focus. In my zone.

Little did I know that seconds later my car would crash right into the back of another vehicle that had been sitting in the street, waiting to turn.

The driver immediately hopped out and started cussing me out. His name was Duane so you can imagine what type of cuss out a Duane with a U could dish out.

I was shaking. It took everything in me to stay calm so that he would be calm.

When we drove away I immediately felt the enemy tell me that I wasn’t good enough. I made it to my hotel room and laid in the bed and cried.

Why couldn’t I get things right? What was wrong with me? Why do I feel so stuck?

But in the midst of my despair I heard a soft and quiet voice whisper “you need to slow down.”

I realized that I had been doing so many things out of God’s plan.

 And it all came from the unnecessary pressure I have placed on my life to perform.

I was so obsessed with not being a failure that I was driving speeds ahead, distracted by busyness and fear. If I would just slow down, I would be able to avoid those crash and burn moments.

There’s an unexplainable peace after the wake up call because you finally enter…

The Freedom

This is the only stage that matters.

When you are operating in your freedom you don’t get stuck in the other stages for long. Unfortunately, many people spend a lifetime in the first three stages and ignore the many wake up calls in stage four.

That ain’t us though.

The ONLY way to reach this breakthrough is to admit that you haven’t been authentic to yourself.

And as much as you play the pity game, you aren’t clueless.

You know when you don’t have peace. When you’re unsettled. When you stress over and over.

You don’t trust yourself; or God for that matter.

I dare you to make a list. On one side write the things you absolutely love to do and on the other, list everything that doesn’t bring you peace right now.

For example, one thing I wrote that I love to do is dance. So today, I coughed up $15 that I would have spent on something dumb and bought some Zumba classes.

They more you chase authenticity, the less self-inflicting pressure you will put on yourself.

Your Future Is In Your Hands

You are fully capable to have a bomb life.

And I understand that the dream comes with the pressure to do everything right and make every right move.

But freedom is knowing that you’re allowed to mess up and it STILL won’t mess up the incredible success ahead.

The only thing that could stop it is you.

Your destiny is already laid out. Blessings on top of blessings ready to come at you. All you have to do is remove the fear and boldly trust that you can do this.

Because you can.


Liberating Advice to Struggling Emotional Spenders (From A Hotmess Emotional Spender)


“I’m literally the worst.”

Am I the only one who tells myself this after I gallivant through the mall yet again? With a car of bulky shopping bags, an empty wallet and an even emptier spirit it never fails. I always sit feeling depleted after that unplanned shopping trip.

You don’t completely regret what you just bought (bc let’s face it, those shoes are here for an edge snatch) but you have this overwhelming guilt that always takes over when you pull a stunt like this.

But I mean COME ON. What’s the big deal anyway?

Retail therapy is the cure of all cures, right?

Emotional Spending

Beginning in high school, I developed this unhealthy habit of running to shopping when I felt my lowest and out of control in my life. Although temporary, I hoped that a new outfit would help me to redesign my inner turmoil.

Just maybe this would be the dress that helped with my awful day at work  or the lipstick that would say the right thing to people I hoped to impress. I never really needed anything knew but I would convince myself I did.

Outside of loans, emotional spending was single-handely the one thing that destroyed my finances and if you’re reading this it probably killed yours too.

(Now turn to your neighbor and say, NEIGHBOR. We’ve got to stop wasting our money on a new pair of J’s and late night runs to Whataburger)

The Source of My Emotional Spending Pain Started Here

My emotional spendingness didn’t just pop out of then air. It came in a day that changed me forever.

On a hot summer in Texas, I got a call while I was at work that my father had collapsed at a grocery store. Rushing out of my shift, my mother (they are divorced) and I drove to the hospital. When I ran through those doors, I saw my uncle who had his head hanging low like wilted fruit. I immediately knew.

I was 17 when I lost him to a heart attack.

That life changing event sent me into a world spin. I desperately searched for where my identity could belong. Because he had served in the army, I started to receive a check every month until I graduated high school. My mother saved some for my first semester at college but the rest was game to blow.

And blow I surely did do. I had the newest shoes. Fly clothes, not a stain on me. I ate out at restaurants and drove all around town in my little white 1995 Mercury Tracer. YA’LL. This thing had the automatic seat belts that smoothly slid into place when you closed the doors. Like whet? You couldn’t touch me.

Life looked great on the outside by my internal was filled with abandonment, rejection, unhappiness and the need to be validated.

When I think about it now, I hate that I blew money as a means to escape but the habit grew during college and beyond.

It wasn’t until I analyzed my paycheck to paycheck lifestyle that I knew something had to change.

Why We Are Emotional Spenders and 5 Ways To Chill Out For You Future’s Sake

If you’ve experienced life like I have, most likely you’ve used shopping as a means to escape. And there is NOTHING wrong with that.

But when it starts to become the first thing you turn to when stress levels rise, it’s coping. The problem is that your issues don’t disappear when you charge that card. You just have a fatter bill and a deeper hole to fill.

According to Investopedia, “Emotional spending occurs when you buy something you don’t need and, in some cases, don’t even really want, as a result of feeling stressed out, bored, under-appreciated, incompetent, unhappy or any number of other emotions.” WELL.

Fresh prince emotional spender

For the longest, I didn’t believe that I was an emotional spender until I realized I did this:

  • Justified my purchases to myself. Often included the phrases “Man, I deserve this bro” or “It’s just a couple things…or four, no big deal.”
  • Sneak and hide bags. I currently stay with my aunt and uncle and STILL do this from time to time.
  • Walked away from my purchase with a dash of you shouldn’t have bought that guilt.
  • Had and still have a plethora of things I’ve never used or only once.
  • Constantly thought about how other people would react to me with that purchase. For example, “Man ima eff em up with this blazer tonight.”
  • Wouldn’t check my bank account for days because I already knew it’s looking a mess.

Were you laughing while reading that just now? YOU’RE BROKE. Stop the denial. Or at least get some damb control because it’s ruining your ability to set your future up to win.

Are you still with me? Perf. Here are 5 practical ways to break up with this habit immediately:

#1. Unsubscribe from your store’s email lists

I’m convinced that Amazon and Fashion Nova are the works of the enemy.

To fight your emotional spending, go through your emails and start unsubscribing from all your favorite stores. I get at least 30 emails a DAY from companies:

EMotional Spender

That’s just from before 7 a.m. I got flooded with these emails EVERY single day.

I realized that I was way more tempted to buy something if I saw the “Hey get your 87% off because it’s the 87th day of the year” email. Let’s just avoid all temptations by wiping them out the inbox.

#2. Don’t Fall For the “Sale” Tactic

Speaking of sales. Be aware of the Buy 2 get one 1 free trick. I humbly admit that H&M got me with this one this weekend. The first thing you think is “What? Free? How could I pass up free?” But the problem is that you didn’t save on anything. You spent more by buying the first two items.

You may catch things on sale but if you’re broke you literally just wasted more money because you saw a sale and are being a cheapo.

I work part time at a handbag store and they always mark up their “sales” prices to make it seem like you’re getting a better deal. You ain’t. Thou shall never be playeth by the Sale sign.

#3. Implement the 24-hour Rule

Most of impulse shopping comes from the need to fill a void right in the moment.

Most of impulse shopping comes from the need to fill a void right in the moment. Click To Tweet

You can overcome this by placing your items on hold for at least 24 hours. More often than not, we will forget about that MUST HAVE item as soon as we leave the store.

This not only is great for your bank account but it helps implement discipline and the ability to tell yourself nah.

Emotional Spender

If you find yourself still dreaming about that item after you’ve left the store, proceed to tip #4:

#4. Give Yourself Permission to Splurge

The reality is that there’s going to be something that always catches your eye. But purchases are way more worthwhile when it’s an item you absolutely love or feel confident AF in.

Create a splurge account or jar and start moving a little money each week. It could be as little as $5-10. Whenever you feel the need to have a retail therapy day, you will get to pull from this instead of your I’m broke and should be saving money jar.

I have an envelope called “fun money” and specifically use it for the emotional, I need a Snickers days.

#5. Piece Together Your Peace

As much as these tips could work, it won’t stop you from spending if your center isn’t whole.

It took me a long time to accept hard truths like that my daddy’s death created some abandonment issues. That I constantly felt insecure unless I received compliments on how I looked. That I ran to shopping and buying food to fill me instead of God and my truths.

I spent because I desperately wanted to be this certain girl, but I wasn’t honoring who I am.

Who are you? Do you know?

A practical way to find out is to remove one big distraction for at least a week. I’ve found that when I am constantly distracted by shows, music, friends, social media and just noise, that I begin to deny what I really want.

But that whisper is always there and will come back to you when you get still. Try to pick something to eliminate and replace it with devotionals, watching an inspirational video or listening to a podcast this week.

Your Retail Therapy Won’t Fix You

You are more than a new bag.

Bigger than a chain or a car.

Explosively larger than any material thing you run to.

Don’t you think it’s time you grabbed control to create the freedom you deserve?

Let’s stop tap dancing for our insecurities and trading outside validation for the peace and control we can create in our 20’s.

You bout it?